Iā€™m Carrie ā€” homeschool coach, curriculum author, and busy mom to three wild boys. I help moms homeschool with purpose, confidence, & joy!


Grace and Parenting

July 21, 2015

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Grace & ParentingGrace & Parenting

The house was still and quiet. We had finally finished evening chores, put the boys to bed, and my hubby and I had just sat down in the living room. Before too long, we heard the tell tale pitter-patter of little feet coming down the hallway. “Momma, I want to snuggle.”

Sigh. It was bedtime, we told him not to get up. I tried to rationalize with him.

“But buddy, it’s bedtime. You are tired after a busy, busy day.”

By now he is at my feet.

“But momma, I want to snuggle.”

I gave him “the look” that ordered him back to bed, but he crawled into my lap.

“I need to snuggle momma.”

So I wrapped my arm around him and we talked about his day. Then I asked him if he’d like to work on learning his letters because he’s been so interested in them lately. Sure enough, he was thrilled to. So I grabbed his letter flashcards and we worked our way through them. After we had finished he was ready to go back to bed, I tucked him in, and he went to sleep.

You know what? I’m a softie mom.

We told him it was time for bed.

We told him goodnight.

We told him not to get up.

And then he got up.

And I snuggled rather than enforce the rules.


Because sometimes parenting is as much about grace as it is the rules. The rules, the books, and the speakers all may say the best thing to do is set the routine and enforce the rules, but they don’t always take love and grace into account.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. -1 Corinthians 13:4-8a

Sometimes love says a boundary must be enforced for their good.

And sometimes love says grace is in order for their good.

Grace {noun}

mercy; clemency; pardon

favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity


Could he have been manipulating to delay bedtime? Possibly. But for now I don’t think so.

Love said grace was in order because he needed his momma.

And grace was in order because he is growing up so quickly. Three short years ago he was not even a month old yet. Three short years later he is begging to learn his letters and starting to get a few right when we work through flash cards.

Where did my baby go?

In parenting, sometimes love says grace is in order for their good.

Grace recognizes that time flies–that even the frustrating moments won’t last forever. That they’ll be grown and gone in a few short years. That in some moments, they need us rather than rules.

And in doing so, grace gives us the opportunity to tuck another sweet memory into our hearts. I won’t mourn my children’s growth, but I know that the lasts come quickly. Someday he won’t ask to snuggle . . . and I don’t want to pass up the last because I was tired.

So last night, we snuggled. And I don’t regret it. I don’t mind being a softie mom, sometimes they just need grace.

Grace & ParentingGrace & Parenting

Be encouraged,


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{Post shared at The Deliberate Mom, A Little R & R, Mom’s Morning Coffee}

  1. Thank you for this, Carrie! I love that as moms, sometimes we give grace to our children, and sometimes we GET it from them! Thanks be to the God of all grace! Blessings on your day…stopping by from Coffee & Conversation. šŸ™‚

    • Carrie says:

      Excellent point Elizabeth! Oh, how often do we snap at them only to receive their grace and love as well!

  2. Anastasia says:

    This post is so great-I can completely relate. I had a night like this two nights ago. I knew that my son needed to go back to his bed but chose rather to let him fall asleep snuggling with me. The older they become the more you realize that they wont want to snuggle forever and its so precious to just stop and snuggle when you get the chance!

    • Carrie says:

      Thanks for sharing Anastasia. I’ve found my oldest (mostly a touch-me-not) tells me when he needs me–and it’s usually after I’ve been gone a lot or we were busy. There’s plenty of time for rules and regulations later, snuggles don’t last forever.

  3. Nicole says:

    Fellow softie mom here! You know what: A child that tells you exactly what he wants and needs to feel safe, secure, and loved makes this parenting job a heck of a lot easier on a day like that, and I, for one, would not want to miss the opportunity to give my child what he needs. Plus, who doesn’t love to snuggle?! Found you on the #CoffeeandConversation link up. Thanks for sharing!

  4. Wonderful reminder that love sometimes dictates grace. We definitely need it from our kids at times, so we must take opportunities to show it. God LAVISHES me with grace – why am I so stingy with it!? Visiting from Mom’s Morning Coffee.

    • Carrie says:

      So true Abi! I think we are often stingy because grace calls us to the inconvenient. Grace is easy to give when it doesn’t interfere with what I want! It’s another area God uses motherhood to refine us with šŸ™‚

  5. An honest and touching post! Yes, sometimes parenthood/motherhood is more about grace than rules or schedules. Sometimes we, as mothers, need grace and sometimes we need to give grace as well. Plus, like you said, the lasts come much more quickly than we’re ready, so why not savor every now you can before it becomes a last šŸ™‚

    • Carrie says:

      I love what you said about needing grace as mothers as well. It’s another important area we need to work at extending grace in šŸ™‚ Thanks for stopping by!

  6. Rebekah says:

    Awww… I’m a softie mom too. There are of course times when I need to be consistent and firm but I never want to say no to my kids when they want to snuggle. I love seeing them grow and change but I have to admit it’s hard for me too. I just want to bottle these precious days up. I am so thankful for Gods grace when I just need him near to me instead of being reminded of my sins. Grace triumphs over all!

  7. Rachel says:

    I found you through the Shine BlogHop, and I’m so glad you posted this link! Leaning toward the grace side of parenting is not my natural first reaction, but moments like this remind me it should be more often! Thanks for the encouragement. šŸ™‚

    • Carrie says:

      Thanks for stopping by and commenting Rachel! It isn’t always my first inclination either, I’m a work in progress. It’s amazing how the Lord uses motherhood to refine us and show us His heart for us in the process šŸ™‚

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Hey there! My name is Carrie and I'm an everyday wife and homeschool momma to three {very} energetic boys.  


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