I’m usually an optimist and love to find something to laugh at in everything . . . but to be honest, this is a challenge. When the aches and pains begin and the waves increase it’s hard to stay positive because you don’t know how long this round will last, or how much more painful it will get. That speaks to so many trials in life, doesn’t it? But the Lord is always gracious and where lies whisper, His truth can and does abound.

I live between two conflicted traits: on one side I’m too likely to trust and on the other side I don’t trust at all. The result is often that I’m wary of trusting those I love the most–just in case. In my walk with Christ, this causes the most tension because on one side I trust . . . but on the other I’m wary and I like to keep my just-in-case options open. Can you identify?

Moments. Life is made up of them. Some we tuck away in our hearts for safe keeping. Some we forget in the recesses of day-in, day-out. Sometimes, it’s the little things that bring them all flooding back. I sat tired, in an empty room within an empty house. Our belongings piled high in the moving truck, the air heavy with expectation, excitement, grief, and lots and lots of humidity. The voices below echoed through the empty walls as I sat washing footprints off grey walls. The memories flooded back and warmed my heart . . .

Unexpected. That sums up so much of life, doesn’t it? It seems we are always doing and planning, and then life shifts and we find ourselves unexpectedly changing course. Sometimes these changes in course are the very things we’ve always wanted. Other times, these course changes hand you the blank pages to a story you didn’t want to write. How do we find hope in those cases?

I must have made quite the spectacle. Little ole’ 5ft3.5in me pushing the over-sized shopping cart with two impatient boys one handed, the other hand carrying 5 large boxes while 8 unruly boxes perched precariously on the cart did their best to scatter across the parking lot . . .

I think we all long for control. And as moms, we all long for that special formula that will give us the results we so long for. The little years are exhausting (can I get an amen?), but there is something in them that eases my tired heart: control. For now, I can control their environment. I can make sure they are safe to learn, play, and grow. For now, their poor choices are easily corrected with a time out, discussion, and hug. For now, I can keep them from bad company and distract them from poor role models. For now, so much of their existence is within my control. But I fully know as time passes on the day is coming when they will exercise their own free will. And that is scary because I can’t control it.

Hello, my name is Carrie and I got myself expelled from Homeschool. Phew, there it is, now you know. This piece of my childhood story typically surprises people when they find out. It’s like my dirty little secret no one can guess–when I reveal it the shocked faces are awesome. Personally, I find it rather amusing. I’ve only met one other person who shares the distinction of being expelled from Homeschool–I’m not sure what comes before rare, but it’s certainly not a story you hear everyday. Nonetheless, it’s the story of the strong-willed child.

Confession: I think birthday cakes are scary. In my eyes, they are a whole lotta pressure masquerading in a shell of sweet innocence. I don’t mind eating cake mind you, but making them is a different story. No one wants to botch their kid’s birthday cake, and if you’re lacking in the artistic talent to make it Pinterest-able, the pressure is on momma . . . the pressure is on.

Have you ever hit one of those moments in life where you begin to wonder what on earth is going on? You feel like things are spinning out of control and life is moving much faster than you’d like. Maybe you aren’t really sure what direction you’re heading, but you’re being carried along in it anyway. Sometimes we just have to wonder what on earth God thinks He is doing, you know?

Motherhood can feel so very “blah”. And as the days and nights go on and on, it’s so easy to believe the lie that what we are doing in this moment doesn’t matter. That our everyday lives–these tasks we complete, the small sacrifices we make, the love we extend–will never impact the world . . . but the truth is your life matters. It matters so much!