February 2, 2015
Let me begin this post by clearly stating this: I LOVE to-do lists, schedules, and routines. They are awesome—there is nothing quite like the feeling of accomplishment when you can check a task off your list (or scribble, I personally prefer scribbling with a vengeance). Lists, schedules, and routines can be a wonderful tool to make life so much easier, efficient, and organized. However . . .
I think there are also times and seasons of life when lists, schedules, and routines can become more of a hindrance than a help. So, without further ado, here are 5 reasons it may be time to toss the cleaning schedule:
If you glance at your list and a menacing voice in your head says “This is where joy has come to die”, it may be time to toss the cleaning schedule. Joking aside, if your cleaning schedule is consuming your life, it may be time to rethink things. Some key indicators that a cleaning schedule is killing your joy would be . . .
Have you ever felt like a marionette puppet controlled by routines, schedules, and tasks? It goes a little like this: Want to snuggle with your 6-week old? Sorry, you ought to be doing the dishes. Beautiful day outside? Nope, you can’t enjoy it, your floors need mopped. Night away with your spouse? Ha! You haven’t finished your list all week, what makes you think you can relax? Just want to go to bed because you are running on 4 hours of sleep? In your dreams, you’ve still got things on your list. If your life has become controlled by a cleaning schedule and it is hindering your ability to enjoy life, it is time to rethink things.
You have a newborn and an 18 month old. You’re adjusting to life all over again and learning how to be a family of four. You’ve had some good days . . . and some bad days. From the moment you came home from the hospital you’ve heaped tons of pressure on yourself. X,Y, & Z need to be done every day, on top of caring for the children (and yourself). If you can’t get it all done like a supermom, you’ve failed. No, it doesn’t matter that you have a newborn . . . there is no room for grace here.
Many times we fail to see that there are seasons of life in which we just need to survive, and that’s ok! Notice the wording there? Seasons. It’s temporary. In the grand scheme of things, it’s a drop in the bucket. You may not have the dishes done every night, you may need to settle for mopped floors once a week, laundry may feel like a revolving door for awhile, but it is temporary. And when we look back on these seasons, I don’t think we will find joy in the fact that we were stressed and worn from accomplishing all the tasks. I think joy will be found in the moments we spent loving . . . in spite of the tasks, in spite of the dishes.
To accomplish that, we sometimes need to realize that the Lord entrusted us with the love and care of our children first. In Jesus’ own example, relationship comes before tasks (Luke 10:38-42).
I’ll admit that I sometimes feel like Martha in this passage, running to and fro distracted by all I need to do. Then when I snap at my children or husband and I feel the Holy Spirit gently correct me, I want to exclaim with Martha “Don’t you see I have work to do?!”
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things,but few things are needed—or indeed only one. (Luke 10:41-42)
If you’ve been unable to extend or receive grace during these seasons, it may be time to rethink or toss the cleaning schedule. Turn your focus to the few things that are needed, and don’t forget your relationship with your family, and especially your relationship with the One who has redeemed your soul.
You read about someone’s cleaning schedule and decided to adapt it for yourself. If they can get done all these tasks in a day, you can too! The problem? Your life is different. What works for someone else may not work for you.
Or, you now have a 5 year old, a 3 year old, and a 1 month old. The 1 month old is a horrible sleeper and you functioning on precious little sleep; yet, you expect yourself to complete tasks X,Y, & Z every day.
For this season, you may need to toss the cleaning schedule. You may need to be ok with surviving for a season. Make life easier (no shame in paper plates when you need them) and learn to be ok with what you can get done today. Got the dishes done? Excellent! Load of laundry? Fantastic! Cleaned the bathroom while the older kids took a bath? Great! Focus on what you can get done, not on what is unreasonable to expect to get done.
To-do lists, routines, and schedules can be a wonderful tool to streamline your productivity and make life better. The problem comes when the schedule becomes our master rather than our servant. When this happens, our families tend to suffer. If your cleaning schedule is no longer simply a tool, it may be time to toss it and rethink some things.
Let me encourage you if you feel like you are drowning in the lists and tasks: this is a season. It’s temporary. When our second was born, our life turned upside down for awhile. He had numerous, severe food intolerances. Our nights were consumed with a screaming infant . . . and our days were consumed by a screaming infant. He was in pain constantly and needed me constantly.
For four months, we survived. The dishes didn’t get done every night. Laundry was always there. I mopped the floors maybe once a month. For those months, things weren’t picture-perfect and I struggled with my cleaning schedule. I desperately wanted everything done. But the Lord reminded me . . .
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things,but few things are needed—or indeed only one. (Luke 10:41-42)
All He had required of me was the few. He didn’t expect my house to sparkle or for me to have an awesome routine. What peace this brought my heart! Knowing He had required only the few allowed me to sleep content in the fact that though my house was less than perfect, I had done all He had required of me that day.
Two months later, we had finally found a solution for him and I had time again to focus on the house. We developed a great routine for a few months. Then, life hit again and all that was required was the few.
If you are in one of these seasons momma, I invite you to seek the Lord and ask what He is requiring of you. You may find that you’ve been worried and upset about many things . . . but few things have been required of you . . . or indeed only One.
Do you use a cleaning schedule? How has it helped or hindered you?
Post linked at A Mama’s Story, A Little R & R, Mom’s Morning Coffee, The Deliberate Mom
the thing about pearls
Pearls of course find their birth in an invasion, generally a parasite or irritant. Something the oyster did not ask for, or likely want. I can so identify with that. Yet, the very beginning of what we call beautiful and valuable is something that should not be.
why the everyday matters
Have you been in that spot of vision-less existence? Where the day-in and day-out steal your passion and the demands of life blind you to purpose?
formulas belong in math, not parenting
I think we all long for control. And as moms, we all long for that special formula that will give us the results we so desire. The little years are exhausting (can I get an amen?), but there is something in them that eases my tired heart: control.
Found you on Shine Blog Hop and this list could not be more true! I’m learning to focus more on the people around me than the chores piling up.
I used to pin those cutesy cleaning schedules you find on Pinterest that make it sound SOOO easy to clean your house in just 15 minutes a day (assuming that no disasters ever happen and kids never make messes and you always put everything away right when you’re finished….)
Now I just try to clean something every day. One thing. That’s it.
Followed you over here from the Shine blog hop, thanks for the good read.
Ooooh, you raise some very interesting points here.
I have a cleaning schedule but I’m pretty flexible with it too. I need the direction because without it, I let things go and then I quickly get overwhelmed by the mess.
Thanks for sharing and for linking up to the #SHINEbloghop!
Wishing you a lovely day.
xoxo
I really get very confused when I have to clean without a schedule! I need to have a plan, otherwise I am lost! Thanks for the post! It is really interesting! Greets, Lewisham Carpet Cleaners Ltd.